Thursday, June 30, 2005
3:38 PM
sigh*
fmaths paper.. don't wanna talk about it.
really tired today.. came home after going to buy school rumble book 4.. came online.. and then..........
sigh. i don't want to talk about it..
988 746853 6659 729 844647 5453 8428 9436 968'73 7374687 22688 48..
9436 968 729 43 968 78263 2 242623..
93'73 3438336 93277 27278.
968 27533 43 4 9455 23 843 663.
4 366'8 5669 9428 86 729 2696673..
tried to sleep but couldn't.. because of what someone said to me.. i feel tired but i just can't get to sleep..
432782243..
47 8447 367 7325?
sigh..
the memories
so dear
Wednesday, June 29, 2005
1:29 PM
physics*
a killer paper.
what i studied didn't come out.
what i failed to understand was set in the paper.
the jc2s are in the middle of their math paper now. mag, michelle and ika are in the middle of their bio paper as well, if i'm not wrong.
last night, terrence explaned projectile motion to me. i kinda understood but i knew that physics was a gone case. haha. i went to the band room this morning to pia physics. i spy with my little eye, "my dream came true when i found you" scribbled in the notes in the middle of the notes on motion in a circle. no prizes for guessing whose notes they are. no, they're not my notes. haha.
i have ice cream envy me. muahahahahaha.
okay that was so random.
physics paper killed me. the last three questions alone made up 33% of the paper. it's insane i tell you. insane!! oh well.
after paper, i went to the band room again. kiong wee, clement and kian hong were there.. went to have lunch with them, sujin came and left, blah. was supposed to go comic shopping with benjamin but he disappered after paper.. he said he's too depressed about the paper. poor boy.
left school when their math paper started.. ran into julian at the bus stop..
julian: hey. no more papers liao arh?
me: today none le, tomorrow still got fmaths.
julian: oh, too bad.
fine, so you finish papers today. no reason to be so mean *scowls* oh well. guess i should be used to it liao? it's julian after all. sigh.
shall see what random fmaths notes i have lying around then pia fmaths. haha.
the memories
so dear
Tuesday, June 28, 2005
4:54 PM
common test, day two: return of the death-wish.*
HAPPY BIRTHDAY KIONG WEE!
not that he'll read this but hey. i get a kick out of it.
you know you're screwed when you come from an fmaths class and can only do questions 1, 2 and 3 of the maths c paper.
i'm so glad i'm not one of those people ^_^ okay fine so i'm evil. i only couldn't do two questions out of six. it's crazy. question 9 carries 11 marks. question 10 carries 12 marks. and questions 1, 2 and 3 carry 4, 4, and 5 marks respectively.
oh yeah they're screwed xD
of course, i won't be like varun, going around proclaiming, "i'm getting seventy. *beams*"(the paper's upon seventy, by the way. odd number.) and then scream "hah! sixty-nine! i'm getting seventy woohoo!!" strange people.
so yes. i had maths paper today, if you couldn't tell. went for lunch(sorta) with genevia at tmart macs after opening the band room door for wanjun and kian hong, then headed to the band room with kian hong's lunch. sujin was in the band room, studying his physics. kiong wee came after sujin left, then julian called me to ask for the keys. but his paper was starting; no choice, stay in the room until he finish his paper.
fell asleep mugging physics. daniel came into the room, woke me up. sujin and kiong wee came in after. what really woke me up was julian barging into the room screaming "strip kiong wee!!!!!" okay, so i exaggerate, he didn't scream. but it was like a war cry. haha. i know he wants revenge for that time kiong wee, sujin, azfar and christopher stripped him buck-naked. haha. then kiong wee was like, "what, what." and stalking julian all around the room.. i think julian was kinda scared of him haha!
they're going to do it either tomorrow or on friday, so if you don't want to watch then don't come to the band room!(you'll hear screaming, but i doubt it'll be kiong wee who's screaming haha!)
i'm gonna bring my camera. =x hahahahahahaha. evil me.
ran into terrence at the bus stop.. jc2s just finished their physics common test when i left because i had to wait for julian.. i didn't see him till he called out my name haha. borrowed his physics notes. so i have terrence's physics notes and kenneth's chemistry notes. yay. like my physics and chemistry notes are so clean la can.
i want
-ichigo 100% book 13
-ouran koukou host club book 2
-school rumble book 4
-h3 school! book 2 to 5
maybe going to buy tomorrow? hmm. see how lor.
ever had the feeling that you'd rather die than take exams? or that you know you're gonna fail because you didn't study enough? yeah. my death-wish. haha.
okay la. i shall go study physics liao. hmm ter's handwriting very nice haha. okay don't get distracted =x
the memories
so dear
Monday, June 27, 2005
6:52 PM
school, common test, and beach*
just got home.. today was first day of school. i was so happy to see everyone again, especially the first three month s92ers.. haha.. ian has wierd hair now!! =x
chinese was the first paper of the day.. sigh.. could die. but i think it was okay..
chem the second paper.. i retrieved kenneth's notes from under the band room door.. i thought he and kiong wee wanted to pia maths today, wonder what happened to that.. oh well. pia-ed chem one hour before paper.. okay la, i think if i pass it will be a miracle lol.
then after that i went for waffle with genevia, then we went to the beach. we talked about a lot of stuff.. haha.. well, we're just really great friends, i really appreciate genevia. =) yeah. peter messaged me, after so long, to ask about school and *ahemguysahem*, yeah. haha.
quite tired. wanna talk to peter some more, but he's not responding to my smses liao? maybe he's busy at work la.
sigh. tata.
the memories
so dear
Sunday, June 26, 2005
3:01 PM
ladila.*
bon jovi's i'll be there for you, featured in the movie "a lot like love". enjoy.
I guess this time you're really leaving
I heard your suitcase say goodbye
Well as my broken heart lies bleeding
You say true love is suicide
You say you've cried a thousand rivers
And now you're swimming for the shore
You left me drowning in my tears
And you won't save me anymore
I'm praying to God you'll give me one more chance girl
I'll be there for you, these five words I swear to you
When you breathe, I wanna be the air for you
I'll be there for you
I'd live and I'd die for you
I'd steal the sun from the sky for you
Words can't say what love can do
I'll be there for you
I know you know we've had some good times
Now they have their own hiding place
Well I can promise you tomorrow
But I can't buy back yesterday
And baby you know my hands are dirty
But I wanted to be your Valentine
I'll be the water when you get thirsty baby
When you get drunk, I'll be the wine
I'll be there for you, these five words I swear to you
When you breathe I wanna be the air for you
I'll be there for you
I'd live and I'd die for you
I'd steal the sun from the sky for you
Words can't say what love can do
I'll be there for you
I wasn't there when you were happy
And I wasn't there when you were down
Didn't mean to miss your birthday baby
I wish I'd seen you blow those candles out
I'll be there for you, these five words I swear to you
When you breathe I wanna be the air for you
I'll be there for you
I'd live and I'd die for you
I'd steal the sun from the sky for you
Words can't say what love can do
I'll be there for...
I'll be there for you, these five words I swear to you
When you breathe I wanna be the air for you
I'll be there for you
I'd live and I'd die for you
I'd steal the sun from the sky for you
Words can't say what love can do
I'll be there for you...
it's really hilarious listening to kiong wee's version. especially when i said i thought he sang better than ashton kutcher, then he went into an imitation rendition of ashton kutcher. haha! it was so funny. =) haha.
mum's car is going to malaysia tomorrow, and after that it's off to the scrapyard.. i guess this is goodbye to the car that's been with my family for the past 39 years.. kinda sad. we took pictures downstairs just now. gonna print some for keeps. yeah..
oh, ran into my neighbours just now. a whole family of girls. there was this guy with them who reminded me of jason, think it's the eldest daughter's boyfriend or something. haha.
i'll be there for you,these five words i swear to you..
a piece of you = a piece of heaven.
another song also entitled "I'll be there for you", from the sitcom friends.. it's really nice too. haha.
So no one told you life was gonna be this way [four claps]
Your job's a joke, you're broke, your love life's D.O.A.
It's like you're always stuck in second gear
When it hasn't been your day, your week, your month, or even your year, but
CHORUS
I'll be there for you
(When the rain starts to pour)
I'll be there for you
(Like I've been there before)
I'll be there for you
('Cause you're there for me too)
You're still in bed at ten and work began at eight
You've burned your breakfast so far, things are going great
Your mother warned you there'd be days like these
But she didn't tell when the world has brought you down to your knees
CHORUS
No one could ever know me, no one could ever see me
Seems you're the only one who knows what it's like to be me
Someone to face the day with, make it through all the rest with
Someone I'll always laugh with
Even at my worst, I'm best with you
Yeah!
It's like you're always stuck in second gear
When it hasn't been your day, your week, your month, or even your year, but
CHORUS
yeah. haha. what's d.o.a. anyway? haha.
hmm.. wishing.
+++BOY: I need someone to talk to..
GIRL: I'm always here for you.
BOY: I know.
GIRL: What's wrong?
BOY: I like her *s0o* much..
GIRL: Talk to her.
BOY: I don't know.. she'll never like me.
GIRL: Don't say that. You're amazing.
BOY: I just wanna tell her how I feel ..
GIRL: Then tell her.
BOY: She won't like me.
GIRL: How do you know that?
BOY: I can just tell.
GIRL: Well, just tell her.
BOY: What should I say?
GIRL: Tell her how much you like her.
BOY: I tell her that daily.
GIRL: What you mean?
BOY: I'm always with her. I love her.
GIRL: I know how you feel. I have the same problem. But he'll never like me.
BOY: Wait. Who do you like?
GIRL: Ooh, some boy..
BOY: Ooh, she won't like me either.
GIRL: She does.
BOY: How do you know..?
GIRL: Because who wouldn't like you?
BOY: You..
GIRL: You're wrong. I love you.
BOY: I love you too.
GIRL: ..so are you going to talk to her?
BOY: I just did.
+++something sweet to end off the day with.
not looking forward to papers tomorrow.. already given up on chem..
he smells nice. haha. =)gotta open band room door tomorrow, hope i can wake up earlier.. sian.
the memories
so dear
12:01 PM
gosh.*
because guanyu was bo liao enough to do this, and because she was bo liao enough to tag me to do it, this is why i am bo liao enough to do this bo liao thing. here goes.
First, the procedure: Remove the blog at #1 from the following list and bump every one up one place; add your blog's name in the #5 spot; link to each of the other blogs for the desired cross pollination effect.
1. Pei Yun @ http://oceanskies79.blogspot.com
2. Rantings of a Kontrabassist @ http://pinkified.blogspot.com
3. i'm the king, king, king of the castle, not you dude! @ http://erlkonig.diary-land.com
4. GuanYu @ http://cheesey-madness.blogspot.com
5. Nathasha @ http://aoi-tenshi.blogspot.com
Next, five things I miss about my childhood:
1. the fact that i could wake up at 7 when school started at 7.30 because school was right next door.
2. well, back then, topping the class was a breeze. enough said.
3. fooling around with the kids younger than me and messing with their heads. like teaching them all the wrong things haha. how innocent.
4. no boy problems. gah.
5. oh, catching spiders and all manner of insects. *grin*
Finally the tags: i pass this to
1. michelle ngiam
2. feline
3. jessica
muahahha. wonder if they're as bo liao as me on this random sunday morning.
+++gosh. makes me wonder what the hell the world is coming to. arlianny put up a post on friendster, it went something like this.
"This morning, my friend sent me a post which he encountered at one of the feedback websites... it's just amazing how some people can be... the moderator has deleted the post, but nonetheless, many has seen it. i just thought i'll share with you, what the "elite" of singapore thinks about poly students... just really saddening.
Link
Look at the post by "Anonymous" on 23/06/2005 at 01:45:16AM... it should be the most recent post or else the moderator had already deleted the post
_______________________________
THis is what he said :
Anonymous RE: The Singapore Elite
23/06/2005 01:45:16AM
I refer to this issue and would like to offer my opinions.
Coming from a top jc in Singapore and studying at NUS, I cannot help it but really have to laugh at my fellow countrymen.
Many of those poly students who cannot get into local universities easily get 2nd upper or 1st class honours from overseas universities. These people may then pursue a PhD and end up as professors at NTU and NUS.
How can our universities be world-class when we have a bunch of 2nd class citizens kidding themselves as "professors". Hello! Wake up!
Poly students should be banned from further studies. NTU and NUS should only be reserved for the brightest jc students and we together with the foreigners will form the elite of Singapore!
I seriously hate those poly students.... they even have problems getting their Bachelors... do PhD? Don't make me laugh!"let me analyse this person's so-called opinions.
1.
...bunch of 2nd class citizens...what makes a second-class citizen? one who has not been to a jc? one who pursues their studies overseas? or some pathetic bastard who can't even leave his name while he attacks people who are weaker - i use
weaker, not lower-class, than him? how can he feel that he is so
right in calling poly students second-class? he probably does not know that there are many poly students who become successful people even though they did not make the cut for admission into local universities. and then, my dear friend, what would you call those from jcs who choose to study overseas, like those poly students? or those from jcs who cannot make the cut for local universities? are they second-class citizens as well? you, my friend, are terribly wrong.
the fact that they can go on to foreign universities(with much higher standards than our local universities, i presume, seeing you pointedly said that our universities are not world-class), the fact that they can get 2nd upper or first class honors, shows that they have enourmous potential. and the fact that they can come back to singapore and pursue a phd.. doesn't that tell you something? what makes you think that they can 'easily' get the honors?
2.
...end up as professors at NTU and NUS.the fact that they are qualified to be professors says a lot. fullstop.
3.
poly students should be banned from further studies.so where would that leave them? dear anonymous contradicts himself in this way by saying that he has no respect for the poly students who further their studies overseas, then says that they should not be even given a chance for admission into local universities. then what should the poly students do? why don't you offer some constructive comments instead of shooting your mouth off, dear anonymous.
4.
NTU and NUS should only be reserved for the brightest jc students and we together with the foreigners will form the elite of Singapore!so he's against singaporean students studying overseas but he's okay with the giant influx of foreign students coming to study in singapore? and he's okay with letting the so-called 'elite' class consist of people who study here, leave singapore and go back to where they came from? in other words, his 'elite' class consists of only the singaporean jc students. let me tell you something, friend.. jc isn't everything. jc doesn't gurantee you a comfortable life, cars, houses, maids-in-waiting.. no such thing. you choose where you want to study, if you make it, good, if not, look for other alternatives, finish studying, get out there and get a job. same as everyone else. and just because you studied in nus doesn't mean you boss isn't going to treat you like shit on your first day, or on your days to come. just because you studied in nus doesn't mean you're more impressive than someone who studied overseas. a university is still a university. at the end of the day, you still get the cert. if you got your cert in nus, and xyz got their cert in abc university, it won't make a difference because it's still a university cert.
..and you have no right to hate the poly students. what have they done to you man. you coming from a 'top jc' doesn't give you the right to critisize others. doesn't give you a right to say what should or should not be done. let's wait till you're the next prime minister, then we'll talk. even though you're in nus, or came from a top jc, this post clearly shows that you don't use your brain enough before opening your mouth.
so, now, what will people think of nus students?
bloody f*cked-up arrogant egoistic bunch.and hey, i wouldn't blame them.
jackasses like this one make life terrible for people. i vote we kick him out of singapore and let him be all 'patriotic' somewhere else. gah. one less idiot will make the world a better place for all.
why can't we love everyone?sigh. young people these days.
the memories
so dear
Saturday, June 25, 2005
6:24 PM
studying!*
i have completed physics, math, and fmath(except theory of equation). all that's left is chem, and i've already started on it.
yesterday, went to school to study. christopher had asked me to ask julian to open the band room and 10.30 but he was nowhere in sight. kiong wee, christopher, kenneth and woanrong came. did physics, then we went for lunch. chong hui came to look for us after.
by the time julian came, it was 3.30. he came looking like he just woke up(i think he did), and left with a face like thunder. talk about bad mood huh. went into the band room, where i did math behind the marimba, listening to kenneth's mp3 player at the same time. the guys went to play risk, and kenneth took out his sax. christopher was fooling around on the oboe. after a while, kiong wee and christopher left(but not before kiong wee made sure i knew how to lock the band room haha), around 5+. so me, woanrong and chong hui took out some instruments.. i took out a trombone, woanrong took kenneth's sax and chong hui took out some random person's trumpet.
we tried to play 7th night of july.. ahhhhhh!! my tone sucks now!! i want my tone back! ._. my sound on the trombone was totally awful.. couldn't hit the high notes.. i used to be able to!! *wails* then i switched the trombone for an euphonium but honestly, i didn't sound much better. *wails some more*
soon after, woanrong left, then chong hui.. ms norzian came into the room, apparently there was alumni practice that night.. then chong hui messaged me to tell me the gates were locked. so i quickly ushered kenneth and his friend out of the room.. then we wandered around trying to find a gate that was open.. went home.
talked to marcus for a long time last night. =)
today, went to school again. i was supposed to open the band room but all the shutters were locked!! there was no way to get up to the band room. so i met up with woanrong, kiong wee(who cut his hair but kept the fringe) and kwang liang outside the council room.. trust the school to choose today to do their fumigation! bloody smoke was choking.
my stuff was all in the band room, but woanrong had chong hui's notes on thermochemistry, so i borrowed that first. kiong wee was quite amused by the way this insect landed on his arm and then couldn't move because of the forest of arm hair.. =x he was playing with the insect using his pen and two pencils. then he asked if the bug would grow back a leg that it lost. haha, that bug's now crippled!! =x oops. haha. then, at 12pm, the school attendant came to chase us out of school.. something about it being a half-day. got such thing meh??
so we went off.. went to have lunch at the food court in tampines mall. met kenneth at the bus interchange. he had come after his climb at bukit timah with his family, haha! ran into julian and jingjing at the interchange as well, while we were staring at initial d being played on some random tv screen. they were going to bedok library, so we asked them to keep spaces for us, and we'd join them later. then we wandered around the supermarket trying to find the drinks section. it was hard because they're in the middle of renovations right now! hmm. woanrong left early because she had snyo.
took 69 to bedok interchange.. kiong wee was cracking lame jokes about anything and everything. when we reached the library, we went to look for julian and jingjing. then we decided to go upstairs to the children's section of the library to study! haha. sat in a corner and revised. after a while kiong wee got bored and started pulling out random books to read.
oh, we had this mini-discussion on whether e, as in ln e, is a number or a function. kiong wee says it's a function because it needs to rely on a constant in order to produce a numerical value; kwang liang and i say it's a number, 2.7somethingsomething. kenneth had no say in the matter because he had wandered off to get something to eat. thought he was rather distracted today, like the way he went and hid in a corner to make a phone call. hmm. haha!
at around 5, we went down to find julian and jingjing. kwang liang and i had to leave to go home, but i think the rest went out.
i want to play lan!! it's been absolute ages since i last played. chong hui said he's going to take five of us on at once. so far, my team has kiong wee, julian, and kenneth. one more person! we're so going to pwn chong hui. haha! oh, can't wait to go play pool too! organise mini outing yes? haha.
hmm.. rather tired. had a headache on the way home, and here i am, blogging. the things i do to keep my random readers happy. oh well. such is life, i guess.
the memories
so dear
Thursday, June 23, 2005
4:41 PM
airport*
actually wanted to meet ika at school today, but woanrong asked me to go to the airport to study with them, i.e. her, one of her friends, chong hui, kwang liang, kiong wee and christopher.
she told me 10.30, so i reached around that time. problem: i haven't been to the airport in ages, like almost four+ years, so when i reached burger king, i wasn't sure if it was the right one. sat there for a while looking stupid.. then took another walk around the airport trying to find them. then i called woanrong, chong hui and christopher.. they were actually at the same bk that i was at, only they were blocked by the pillar so i didn't see them! how stupid man.. haha..
studied physics.. then we went for lunch.. actually only kiong wee, kwang liang and christopher were there when i arrived.. those guys are so lame man.. haha.. every five minutes have something crappy to say. then kiong wee kept trying to sing that song in a lot like love. i'll be there for you, these five words i swear to you, when you breathe, i wanna be the air for you, i'll be there for you.(it's from bon jovi's i'll be there for you, kiong wee will be thrilled that i found out the third line lol!) he said he was going to find an electric guitar to strumm and sing that. and we're all gonna shout, "you suck!" hehee. we're gonna have an outing after the common tests to watch that movie!
when we went for lunch, woanrong and her friend came. crap i forgot her name already.. haha. we went to popeye's after leaving the boys at the staff canteen. talked about a lot of stuff. yeah.. haha.
went to meet the guys at bk again. chong hui came already by then. the guys were playing dai di and they bought ten boxes of those star potato things at bk! ten boxes! haha. we girls were studying. so hardworking right! i was doing math. haha. julian came with his girlfriend jingjing.. haha.. then i think they were discussing ******'s birthday present.. haha.. i listened to them and i knew what they were talking about already! haha christopher was still blur tho. julian sat somewhere further off with his girlfriend and the game of dai di continued.. haha.
then i had to go, because i'm having my piano lesson in.. 5 minutes! haha! =) when i left the guys were still playing dai di.. woanrong and her friend were still studying.. and julian was asleep on the table. haha!
going back tomorrow though. it's fun studying with the guys, and i have to admit, it's better than studying by myself haha. and i did get a lot done today! haha. meeting marcus in the morning first, he needs to see my fmath notes. then i'll get him to help me abit with physics, before i go meet the guys and do more math. i guess. what else can i do? chem? oh please. don't make me laugh.
hey, who's that anonymous man. it's twb can. haha. =)
the memories
so dear
Wednesday, June 22, 2005
3:19 PM
*
when the music fades
and all is stripped away
and i simply come
longing just to bring
something that's of worth
that will bless your heart
i bring you more than a song
for a song in itself
is not what you have required
you search much deeper within
through the way things appear
you're looking into my heart
i'm coming back to the heart of worship
and it's all about you
it's all about you, jesus
i'm sorry lord for the things i've made it
when it's all about you
it's all about you, jesus.
i especially love the last three lines of the first verse.. you search much deeper within, through the way things appear, you're looking into my heart. if only we humans could do this too. look past the surface and look deeper. why are people's impressions affected by countenance?
i try, really, i do.
[character counts more than countenance] was what i once told someone.. i mean what i said.. and i know you understood.
but it was too late.
the memories
so dear
2:01 PM
dot*
might not go to school after all. hmm.
1. If there is one thing I can't stand it's people who whine. gah.
2. I love it when i get compliments! =) who doesn't love compliments!
3. My boyfriend/girlfriend is non-existant, thankyou. unless you count the tuba in the band room, we're married. =)
4. My best friend is a wonderful gal. and i love her lots.
5. I love my family because i love them. does love need a reason?
6. When I first met my best friend we were kinda not-very-good-friends. haha. strange how things work.
7. I've never scored an a1 in mep. haha.
8. I would never dislike someone who's nice. haha.
9. One really good piece of advice someone has ever given me was to forget all the wrongs he's done me and concentrate on studies.. i could see him later. thank you! =) good luck for a's this year you.
10. If/When I get married I want for our marriage to last forever. haha wishful thinking? hmm.
11. If/When I get married, our first dance will be to something slow. =)
12. If I could live ANYWHERE in the world, it would be in the countryside. somewhere in canada, maybe, near the mountains.
13. My dream house is big, and it has lots of outside space, too.
14. My top five favorite bands are i don't really listen to bands haha.. unless concert bands.. haha.. then tkwo(tokyo-kosei), tkgssb, tpjcsb, tjcsb and uh.. i don't know. haha.
15. My top five favorite singers are utada hikaru, ayumi hamasaki, ryan cabrera, collin raye, and uh stefanie sun. =)
16. One Nsync song I actually like is drive myself crazy. i think that's the title. or is it just 'crazy'? hmm.
17. One Britney Spears song I can tolerate and can actually admit to liking is everytime.
19. Disney movies are cool hehee.
20. Johnny Depp is quirky! haha.
21. Milla Jokavich is quite unknown to me.
22. When I turn/turned 21 the first thing I did/will do was/is i haven't decided yet. haha.
23. I'm in love with you. lalala.
24. I could eat nothing more. i'm quite full from lunch you know.
25. Four friends I would love to live with are marcus, vanessa, michelle, and jessica!
26. My mother is there.
27. when you're trying to decide what is the best movie ever, it's always a matter of perspective lol!
28. random sushi place is the best place to eat.
29. If I were famous, I would be uh, rich? haha.
30. One person, alive or dead, I would like to meet would be uhh.. someone? haha.
31. The one person I've learned the most from in my life is ...i don't know, actually. there are many people i learn from. all my great friends. and then there are the others. bits from everyone. =)
32. I wish I could be stronger when it comes to emotions and matters of the heart..
33. I wish I was more sure of what i am feeling.
34. The first person who ever broke my heart was twb. i'm sure many people know him. never did change.
35. I can't believe that people can't believe that i had an 8-month relationship with twb. oh well. get over it.
36. I have lived in pasir ris for 10++ years already.
37. Love is wierd.
38. Seeing is not necessarily believing.
39. I look far. but i'm not threatened by the future.
40. The Olsen twins are strange.
41. The one thing I feel like right now is cecegbc. band members will understand it! haha.
42. This one time my friends and I climbed out of school through the hole in the fence. whee cool~
43. The last time I cried was in september. i don't intend to cry any time soon.
44. I am very confused.
45. I wish that you'd give me a chance.
46. Love is a wonderful thing when you have it.
47. My dad is somewhere overseas.
48. I regret ever meeting you. no, wait, i don't. why do you confuse me so. ._.
49. I wish to be slimmer damnit. =x
50. I need someone to talk to. right now.
51. I want my friends. i miss them badly.
52. I've always loved having my close friends around.
53. I can't handle people who cry. =x
i am bored. i need someone to talk to. i wish you'd give me a chance.
968'83 924833 34448336 666847.
4 7243, "366'8 968 84465 48'7 8463 86 367438 437? 23837 255, 84373 9455 23 68437 44757 946 5453 968 866."
288 968 7243, "4'6 237243 8428 4 226'8 5453 8436 2225."
669, 4 9268 86 275 968, "9455 968 4483 63 2 242623?"
"43 968 36 668 5453 63 78455, 48'7 6529."
"288 47 48 76774253 367 968 86 3836 879 86 5453 63?"
"67 26 4 275464 367 866 6824?"
the memories
so dear
1:11 PM
sigh*
uploaded more photos onto my msn space.. quite bored. check out the photos here. quite sian lei..
dreaming.. somehow it's almost like a dream..
perhaps it is a dream. perhaps..
oh dear. i'm getting confused again. ._.
can't wait for school to start.. not that i like the common tests or anything, but it means i get to see everyone again.. one month is just too long for me.. i have very bad s29 and band withdrawal.. =( i can't wait for everything to be normal.. to go up to the band room every morning.. slacking with the band members.. joking with the s29 people.. i miss the old s29ers especially badly..
sian.. what's wrong with me..
want someone to talk to.. is that too much to ask?
the memories
so dear
11:28 AM
batman!*
yesterday, went to meet guanyu, rebecca and yiqin for lunch..
that dim sum place was at takashimaya, quite nice, even though we spent ages trying to decide what to order, haha! in the end we just ordered small stuffs, like xiao long bao, that kind of thing. yummy! oh man, it was so nice! haha.
haha, guanyu actually put up what we ordered in her blog.. here it is.
2 - xiao long bao
1 - chicken wings marinated in prawn paste
1 - zha leong
1 - pumpkin dessert
1 - deep fried prawn dumplings with salad
1 - zha jiang mian (super big la!)
yeah the noodles was super huge.. haha.. only had one small bowl of it.. but i think it was a little spicy too. the pumpkin dessert was delish! haha! it's like fried somewhat, then there's the icing sugar sprinkled on top! then it's like, when i breathe out, the icing sugar on top will just fly off! then guanyu was quite amused, so she 'copied' what i did, only she blew off practically all the icing sugar on her piece! haha! that made me laugh and more sugar went flying. it was such a hilarious sight, and when the waitress was nearby guanyu would desperately try to pretend nothing was wrong.. haha.
went to plaza singapura after that to watch batman begins.. it's a really nice movie! you guys should go watch it! =) although it's really long.. at least got 2hrs long.. haha.. it's so cool watching him put together his own gadgets and stuff. and then there's the car!! it's like omgmanthat'ssofreakingcool!!!!! haha then we went walking around.. tried to look for little bottles.. but couldn't find.. anyone know where i can get glass bottles about the size of the small beer bottles? or slightly smaller? haha.. can't find at all. jessica said vodka bottles, and she'd be happy to drink the vodka if i paid for it. haha. but what, nine bottles?? haha.
came home.. nothing much. tried doing more chem but i think i failed. sigh.
nothing much today either. my cousin's over here, but she didn't bring vycki. aww! haha. well. quite tired, slept till 11 today! haha. and here i am.
i shall not muse too much today, it's not good for me.
maybe i shall go to school later, to meet ika and benji to study. after all, i need help with chem. and maybe me and benji will do fmath. theory of equation is killing me.
sigh sigh..
the memories
so dear
Tuesday, June 21, 2005
11:37 AM
orchard*
i'm off to meet guanyu, rebecca, yiqin(?) and maybe dinah in a bit at orchard.. we're going to have lunch at this really nice dim sum place(or so says guanyu) and we're going to watch a movie. haha. if i'm lucky i'll run into benji or marucs, they're going to be in that area.
in fact, i'd better leave now.. haha.. maybe ill be late for once.
tata. =)
the memories
so dear
Monday, June 20, 2005
6:03 PM
-*
screaming.
367438 437, 326648.
743'7 668 843 6659 663 688 84373 367 968.
226'8 968 733, 48's 69 279 367 4357, 69 7532 367 2774782623..
326648.
frustrated.
the memories
so dear
4:52 PM
poke it*
i feel like poking my chinchillas. just to see what'll happen.
actually, i do know what'll happen.
ruby will hop around, annoyed.
peanut will run awy and then stare at my finger.
raisin will turn around and try to bite me.
momo will just open one eye and glare.
my brother brought home his girlfriend's hamster a few days back. it's quite tiny. hmm. and it has a suicidal tendency. when i took it out of its cage two days ago, the thing spent all its time trying to jump out of my hands onto the ground. it's crazy.
but hey, who cares.
the memories
so dear
3:43 PM
hmm.*
thoughts.
thoughts of me,
thoughts of you.
thoughts of the past,
thoughts of the now,
thoughts of the future.
thoughts of the old,
thoughts of the new.
thoughts of the things that changed,
thoughts of the things that never will.
thoughts of him,
thoughts of her,
thoughts of us,
thoughts of them.
thoughts.
thoughts of me,
thoughts of you,
thoughts of us.
you know, sometimes it hurts to think of the past, or stumble upon something that reminds you of the past. i know the feeling all too well. sometimes it's better to forget, sometimes it's better to remember. in this case.. i don't know which. i've tried to forget, but you're still there, in a corner of my mind. i try to remember but it hurts too badly to do so. it makes me wonder what life would have been like without you. i probably wouldn't be so open. i probably would think less about stuff, unlike now when i can spend hours thinking about the same thing, over and over.
well, what am i doing here, then?
i don't know. i feel strangely.. indifferent.
i hear the songs. i know they're not meant for me. they never were. but time and time again, they amaze me.. i don't know why, but while it used to make me feel like crying, my cursor goes up to that little box with an 'x' and goes *click*. i don't know why i still go there in the first place. after all..
you know, i don't understand why i still dwell on the past. i'd really like to move on with my life, meet new people. in fact, i do move on, but a part of me is just lagging behind, and i need to pull it back.
i'm stubborn.. i refused to remove all traces of you from my life, the way you erased me from yours. i guess, in the end, it's my fault after all.. but i can't just let it go the way you could.. if i did, it would mean forgetting many other memories of other fun times i shared with other people, the things that they did that reminded me of you, or just talking to some of them about you. like that birthday celebration, when i walked with him, and we talked. or rather, he brought it up out of jest. or those times i talked to him over sms. those were good times as well.. but if i were to forget you, does that mean i have to forget those conversations i had with him? how could i forget? it's impossible.
i want to forget.
i need to forget.
i have to.
because i have to move on.
yet..
something holds me back.
i know it's regret.
nat, move on with life, please.
76 6269 84637 968 7243 968'3 367438.
76 6269 84637 968 78455 7363623733.
5878 367438 446.
6683 66.
4 9268 86 279..
288 843 83277 5878 966'8 2663.
949?
4 48377..
4 48377 4 36 6333 7663663 86 8255 86 866.
949 646 48 8253 76 5664 367 63 86 733?
968'73 5878 668 843 663 367 63.
the memories
so dear
1:50 PM
if.*
i hear the song.
finally, i hear it.
and it brings emotions i never knew existed.
if a picture paints a thousand words
then why can't i paint you
the words will never show
the you i've come to know
if a face can launch a thousand ships
then where am i to go
there's no one home but you
you're all that's left me too
and when my love for life is running dry
you come and pour yourself on me
if a man could be two places at one time
i'd be with you
tomorrow and today
beside you all the way
if the world should stop revolving
spinning slowly down to die
i'd spend the end with you
and when the world was through
then one by one the stars would all go out
then you and i would simply fly away
i dare you to tell me it didn't touch you.
the memories
so dear
11:38 AM
dearest*
i like that song on ter's blog, haha. i can just leave his blog open and let the song keep playing. haha.. it's dearest by ayumi hamasaki. i've got the lyrics below, and the english translation, but i'm not sure how accurate it is. i'm going to try and see if i can get that song on radioblogclub.com. meanwhile..
hontou ni taisetsu na mono igai subete sutete
shimaetara ii no ni ne
genjitsu wa tada zankoku de
sonna toki itsu datte
me o tojireba
waratteru kimi ga iru
itsuka eien no nemuri ni tsuku hi made
dou ka sono egao ga
taema naku aru you ni
hito wa minna kanashii kara
wasurete yuku ikimono dakedo
aisubeki mono no tame
ai o kureru mono no tame dekiru koto
deatta ano koro wa
subete ga bukiyou de
toomawari shita yo ne
kizutsuke atta yo ne
itsuka eien no nemuri ni tsuku hi made
dou ka sono egao ga
taema naku aru you ni
deatta ano koro wa
subete ga bukiyou de
toomawari shita yo ne
tadoritsuitan da ne
the engish translation
It would be nice if we could put away and throw out
everything except what really mattered, but
reality is just cruel.
In such times,
I see you laughing
whenever I close my eyes.
Until the day I reach eternal sleep,
that smiling face will
have to stay with me without fail.
People are all sad, so
they go and forget, but--
For that which I should love,
For that which gives me love, I will do what I can.
Back then, when we met,
it was all awkward.
We went the long way, didn't we?
We got hurt, didn't we?
Until the day I reach eternal sleep,
that smiling face will
have to stay with me without fail.
Back then, when we met,
it was all awkward.
We went the long way, didn't we?
We got there in the end.
oh whee, it's on radioblogclub! haha.. whee. why are all beautiful songs in japanese? it's such a complicated language =x my grandad tried to explain it to me before, the way you used a word with reference to items, people, place, and time. a single word has so many variations depending on how it's used.. i was already confused by then! haha.
yup. reality is cruel. haha.. well, guess we all can't be living in a fantasy.
tomorrow going to watch a movie and have dim sum lunch with guanyu and a few random friends.. hey we should ask feline along, shouldn't we? hehee. i have to treat guanyu to lunch tomorrow.. hope she doesn't go and eat too much.. otherwise my wallet got hole le.. ._. so sad! haha.
bouncing to cyndi wang's honey. haha.. hmm now tong hua's playing. =) i like that song a lot too. it sounds so earnest. haha.
i like fairytales, even though they aren't real or anything. no suprise that i love fiction and fantasy.. haha. i really should start writing again.. i feel like that part of me is missing. i haven't written anything for the past six months! i'm probably rusty already.. darn. i really want to write, but i don't seem to have any inspiration anymore.. jc sucks the creativity out of you. darn.. haha.
i do remember buddy, though, and i do still miss her a lot. oh well.
this is foolish's interpretation of buddy.. she's all i imagined, and then some.

it's kinda big and long, yes..
i miss foolish.
i miss the nwn gang..
the memories
so dear
Sunday, June 19, 2005
2:22 PM
template*
yes, a new template.
yes, it has errors. and i don't know why, all right? haha.
but it's so cute. simple and plain, no?
guanyu asked me to do a trigo proving problem. normally i solve these really quickly, but somehow this one seems to be.. more difficult than usual.
sin x + cos x = [(cos x)/(1 - tan x)] + [(sin x)/(1 - cot x)]
haha. i've tried about five different approaches, manupilating the tangent and cotangent, the sine and cosine, making them into a single fraction, blah blah.. haha. shan't bore you.
ah, guanyu's friend solved it. i know where i went wrong.. #($&! careless mistake. haha.
`it's hard to say the sords sometimes.. but i just want you to know that i feel this way about you.. and i hope you feel the same way about me too.*]]
and hey, this is cute. enjoy.
HE: "can I buy you a drink?"
SHE: "Actually I'd rather have the money."
HE: I'm a photographer i've been looking for a face like yours!
SHE: I'm a plastic surgeon .i've been looking for a face like yours!!!
HE: Hi! Didn't we go on a date once? or was it twice?
SHE: Must've been once. I never make the same mistake twice!!!
HE: How did you get to be so beautiful?
SHE: I must've been given your share!!!
HE: Will you come out with me this Saturday?
SHE: Sorry! I'm having a headache this weekend!!!
HE: Your face must turn a few heads!
SHE: And your face must turn a few stomachs!!!
HE: Go on ,don't be shy. Ask me out!
SHE: Okay, get out!!!
HE: I think I could make you very happy.
SHE: Why? Are you leaving?
HE: What would you say if I asked u to marry me?
SHE: Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time!!!
HE: Can I have your name?
SHE: Why, don't you already have one?
HE: Shall we go and see a film?
SHE: I've already seen it!!!
Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.
Man: Haven't I seen you some place before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.
Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.
Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Where I'll be the rest of your life - in your wildest dreams.
hehee. =)
the memories
so dear
Saturday, June 18, 2005
4:20 PM
for lack of a better title.*
i have an ulcer on my bottom lip owowow.
here's what i've been up to.
wednesday, 15th june
khairul didn't call so i assumed no pw meeting. hah. didn't want to go anyway.
headed out to town with michelle and vera. wanted to do some shopping! whee. haha. before that, i went back to school to get my tys-es and notes from my locker.. i didn't know how much stuff i had in there! my bag was so heavy after that! =x
we went to have lunch at takashimaya's foodcourt, then walked around looking for something nice. we walked and walked and walked but nothing caught my eye except the tees in the men's section of the mall.. =x oops.. haha. was supposed to be looking for something nicer! haha. in the middle of everything, ika smsed me something rather.. shocking. haha! i told her, that if she knew, i'd have to kill her. haha. finally we ended up at far east, and i tried on a few shirts. this lady tried to give me a small pair of jeans(which i obviously couldn't fit into ._.) but the shirts were nice.. and i had a hard time deciding which one to get. in the end i got this nice black tee which had this, uhm, knot in it. like, they cut the shirt, twisted the material to get a knot of sorts and sewed it back. i didn't like the knot haha. but i bought the shirt anyway, because i thought it could be, well, saved. haha.
after that, we went down to haagen daaz for ice cream.. it's so sinful. it was so chocolate-y. haha! but it was a nice treat.
then i went home, came online for a while but didn't update. then i packed and left for my grandma's place. talked to ika on the phone for a long time..
thursday, 16th june
i showed my grandma the shirt that i bought, and she helped me take out the knot! now it's just a nice black shirt with gray underneath, so it looks like i'm wearing two shirts. it's really nice! =) did some revision, then got ready to go out to meet mag and ter. it was supposed to be tuba+string bass, but julian wasn't going for the concert, kwang liang was uncontactable, jessica had stuff on and kenneth pang seh us to treat alan to cafe cartel! haha.
wore that new shirt to the concert! haha. i couldn't wear my akademics one, it's too large. left my grandma's at 4.45pm, and just as i stepped out of the house, ter smsed me and asked, where and what time are we meeting later? haha.. so i told him again, and he said he was still at home(ter, i really bai4 to you already.. haha)! he told me to meet the others first and he'd find us later.. i wanted to ask, what others? it's only you, me and mag! haha.
met mag at raffles place mrt, and we walked around some random building for a while and waited for ter. when he reached, we went to bk for dinner. i didn't know that the concert was at 8, so i asked them to meet at 5.30pm! haha so much time. so we sat and stoned for a long time, waiting for jessica(who was in the area). finally we walked off to victoria concert hall, where we saw most of the tpjc band people, as well as a few ex-tkgs band members. met jessica and yogendran there. ter went to join kwang liang and the rest, so the four of us sat together.
acjc played and the multitude with one voice spoke, firestorm, first suite in e flat, gloriosa, gr selections, and some other songs which i forgot.. haha. well, it was really enjoyable, especially the percussion ensomble! they had all kinds of songs, like happy tree friends and myojo instant noodles and looney tunes! haha. it was so fun! the percussion ensomble should have an encore man. haha.
oh, i forgot to see who edwina was. darn. haha.
there was one part after the interval when i sat next to yogendran, and we kept disturbing each other! like there was one song where one of the student conductors was conducting, then yogi told me, stop looking, he's gay. and i said, really, he's gay? just when the crowd softened down! it was so loud lah! haha. stupid yogi disturb me lah. haha.
after the concert, me, mag, yogi, jessica, nicholas and another percussion girl i think went to macs. yogi was being silly again and i chased him, and he really ran =x haha. we sat around and told lame jokes.. then alan, kenneth, junwei, sazali and christopher came. haha. we were telling all sorts of lame jokes and basically ignoring them(not after i smacked kenneth.. pang seh).
then we walked to raffles place mrt together.. went home with jun wei and alan. talked to alan abit after junwei alighted.. yup.
friday, 17th june
it was 12am and i was talking to ika about something. ohwell. she says he's blind. *shrugs*
friday was uneventful. good morning, good night. studied abit and talked to ika some more.
saturday, 18th june, i.e. today
no one called me to tell me that s29 was going to sentosa today =( anyway, went for my niece's baby shower today! she's one month old now. hehee. her name's vycki heng wei qi. such a cute name! haha.. vycki. haha.
i missed my brother.
it was quite fun, all in all.
came home with my brother, and here i am. haha.
i am so proud of mich. she scored a 90 on my quiz. haha go try la. even kaixiang did better than guanyu =x haha.
that's all i guess.
i have an ulcer on my bottom lip owowow.
the memories
so dear
Tuesday, June 14, 2005
3:29 PM
dashed.*
attached.
end of story.
no, not me.
the memories
so dear
1:05 PM
bleagh.*
knock yourself out.
quiz me!
have fun.
the memories
so dear
12:18 PM
terebi keshite!!*
quite tired.
someone not responding to my messages. it's irritating. i hope you're not doing it on purpose because sometimes even the little things you do can really piss me off, even though they're not directed at me, and then you ask me if i'm angry with you. your attitude.. argh. i don't want to comment liao.
me is going grandparents place today maybe. not sure till when. handphone number, you have. anything, call/sms. yup.
i wanna go hammer out armenian dances on the piano.
where are we going to meet for the stupid pw thing huh? you don't tell me i don't want to go liao. okay? don't say i never warn you.
can't wait to see nat tomorrow. neoprints yes yes. camera too. yay.
are you coming for dinner or not?
the memories
so dear
Monday, June 13, 2005
5:12 PM
interview*
hmm. i really screwed up big time, didn't i?
went to watch "mr and mrs smith" with jessica this morning.. we were talking about all sorts of crap.. haha. the movie was nice but it was abit boring actually. haha.. at least, that's what ika and i thought.
daniel messaged me at 9.30 to ask if i could come for the band interview then. i was a tampines mall. and it was 9.30. haha. suvenna tried calling me but i couldn't pick up because i was in the movie.. yup. told mag me and ika would be there asap. or something to that extent.
reached school.. was damn scared. my heart was like a machine gun.. almost panicked. wanted to go hide in the toilet or something.. sian.
i swear that that teacher in white was having so much fun just shooting question after question at me, the girl who was running for band president with no experience whatsoever.. yeah whatever. she shoot until damn guo ying la i think.. sian.. so pissed off. she's called what? lee? yeah. what the heck.
okay fine. it was my fault too. i didn't prepare. yeah. like i knew what to prepare anyway.
arghhhhhhhhhhhhh.
what will be, will be, i guess.. no point wailing over the stupid interview.. fine. fine.
fine.
i'm pretty frustrated. arg. my pw group wants to make plans for a meeting this wednesday but so far i don't know the time, place. damnit! damnit all of you.
._.
go away. please.
26479. 747736. 949 273 958 76 382533 87?!
the memories
so dear
Sunday, June 12, 2005
5:37 PM
well.*
some things are so unexpected! haha!
through dear ahma's blog, i found.. *drumroll* terrence's! haha didn't expect him to have a blog too. well, i guess some things are just this way. haha. bu4 ke3 si1 yi4 you know? haha.
i will try not to think of band interview tomorrow.
(in my anxiety i typed "i will try not to think of band tune in tomorrow". how stupid is that.)
i will sing nice nice songs. game music. maybe me will go play kingdom hearts.
*sigh*
why am i feeling down..?
more numbers may follow. beware.
949 47 48 69 43278 47 259297 46 2 6377?
4 8468448 4 927 25327 22688 469 4 3358..
48377 4 927 97664 484.
4 366'8 3836 5669 43 968 9455 222378 63, 2322873 4 5669 4 226 63837 7375223 437.
288 43 968'73 9455464 86 4483 63 2 242623..
538 63 5669. 968 4283 69 686237.
766384637 4 697353 36 668 8633778263 949 4 36 8447. 43'7 668 46662 7323 8447 269929.
i'm not sure if the numbers are correct, because i'm just looking at the keyboard and typing without reference.. but it should be okay.. i think.
._.
i will not think of interview. tomorrow jessica and i are going to catch a movie, and lunch. we are going to have fun. we i will not think of the stupid interview.
why do i feel so nervous??????
the memories
so dear
1:19 PM
wouldn't it be nice.*
i am back to the days when sighing is part of my hourly routine. i wonder why.
today i found out that jessica has a blog. *startling revelation* marcus(i think it was marcus) tried calling me many many times from a public phone in the airport in a desperate attempt to inform me of his departure for thailand. all that time i could not pick up his calls because i was in church service, and it would be very rude to answer a call in service. i thought it was one of my band friends as there was a number so i tried calling back but to no avail. and right now marcus has probably landed already so i wish him all the best and lots of fun in thailand even though there has been recent, unnerving news about shootings in thailand and i pray that he will be okay.
i am sorry that i sound so detached and stiff today, and that my sentances are long and incomprehensible. i somehow lack the willpower and strength to make my entry look nice and humorous such that it can entertain you. it is my fault, as it always has been. i apologise for the inconvenience caused.
maybe it's because of tomorrow's band interview. i'm practically shaking already. a million and one scenarios are running through my head, followed by a million and one questions with a million and one model answers and yet somehow i know that when i step into the room tomorrow, everything will just go blank and all my 'planning beforehand' sh*t that i'm doing now will go to waste.
i know that once i step into the room, the intimidating aura of daniel, julian(especially julian), dr lee, and mr lim will probably grapple and choke me, and threaten to make me run from the room crying.
i know that when i step into the room, i'll lose my voice, my train of thought, my confidence, my calm, my nerves and maybe my marbles.
i know that when i step into the room, my chest will just tighten up the way it does when i'm freaking out, cutting off my air supply and make me dizzy, and my heart will probably stop beating as i break out in cold sweat.
i know that once i step into the room, i probably won't even have enough strength to walk to the chair and sit down, much less talk.
i know that when i step into the room, the air will feel thick and stuffy no matter how low the temperature is, and i know i won't have enough air.
i know that when i step into the room, they'll probably think what a loser i am, trying for a position when i have zilch experience and didn't even care enough back where i came from.
i know that when i step into the room, they'll expect me to have all the answers to all their questions and wonder how i'm ever going to make it in life when i have none.
i know that when i step into the room, they're probably all ready to kill me with their questions and scary, penetrating stares.
i know that when i step into the room, they'll see the sweat beading on my forehead, my hands wringed in nervousness and desperation, and my heart hammering away merrily.
i know that when i step into the room, they'll be wondering if this scared, pathetic creature in front of them is even leader material, and whether they should just ask me to leave the room and forget i ever existed, or better still, ask me to find out what the heck i'm doing on this planet.
ahh damnit. my thoughts are running wild.
it's true. i don't have any experience whatsoever. except the past three months being class rep, but that's it. i don't know how to run a small organization, much less a band. but i guess the one thing that's in my favor is that i'm willing to learn. yup.. i should think that way, instead of all the negative thoughts up there.. but i kinda feel better now that i got them out. i think. they're so intimidating. i feel scared just thinking about it.
there's a tightness in my chest i can't explain.. and a pain in my tummy. oww.
the memories
so dear
Saturday, June 11, 2005
5:51 PM
simple and clean*
i'm kinda obsessed with game music.. haha.. recently it's kingdom hearts, because i'm playing the whole game over again.. there's a very wonderful instrumental recording of the song "simple and clean" by utada hikaru.. the same person who sang "first love". it's wonderful. orchestrated. wow. haha.
here are the lyrics, by the way.
when you walk away
you don't hear me say
please, oh baby, don't go
simple and clean is the way that you're making me feel tonight
it's hard to let it go
you're giving me too many things
lately you're all i need
you smiled at me and said
don't get me wrong i love you
but does that mean i have to meet your father?
when we are older you'll understand
what i meant when i said no
i don't think life is quite that simple
when you walk away
you don't hear me say
please, oh baby, don't go
simple and clean is the way that you're making me feel tonight
it's hard to let it go
the daily things that keep us all busy
are confusing me
you came to me and said
wish i could prove i love you
but does that mean i have to walk on water
when we are older you'll understand
it's enough when i say so
and maybe some things are that simple
when you walk away
you don't hear me say
please, oh baby, don't go
simple and clean is the way that you're making me feel tonight
it's hard to let it go
hold me
whatever lies beyond this morning
is a little later on
regardless of warnings the future doesn't scare me at all
nothing's like before
when you walk away
you don't hear me say
please, oh baby, don't go
simple and clean is the way that you're making me feel tonight
it's hard to let it go
hold me
whatever lies beyond this morning
is a little later on
regardless of warnings the future doesn't scare me at all
nothing's like before
and then there's the song "eyes on me" from final fantasy 8.. by faye wong. =) it's also very nice okay. i used to have the lyrics on the back of my foolscap pad.. bad habit. always wrote nice and sad stuff, my feelings, everything, on the back of my foolscap pad. very messy piece of carboard.
it's not perfect english, but enjoy.
whenever sang my song
on this stage
on my own
whenever said my words
wishing they
would be heard
i saw you smiling at me
was it real
or just my fantasy
you'd always be there in the corner
of this tiny little bar
my last night here for you
same old songs
just once more
my last night here with you
maybe yes
maybe no
i kind of like it your way
how you shyly placed
your eyes on me
oh did you ever know
that i have mine on you
darling so there you are
with that look on your face
as if you're never hurt
as if you're never down
shall i be the one for you
who pinches you softly but sure
if frown is shown then
i will know that you are no dreamer
so let me come to you
close as i
wanted to be
close enough for me
to feel your heart
beating fast
and stay there when i whisper
how i love your
peaceful eyes on me
oh did you ever know
that i have mine on you
darling so share with me
your love if you have enough
your tears if you're holding back
or pain if that's what it is
how can i let you know
i am more than the face
and the voice
just reach me out then
you will know that you are not dreaming
darling so there you are
with that look on your face
as if you're never hurt
as if you're never down
shall i be the one for you
who pinches you softly but sure
if frown is shown then
i will know that you are no dreamer
pretty song. =) me like. haha.
woanrong.. i said 13.. don't jump to conclusions.. haha!
i thought this skin with the butterflies was nice.. now i have this strange urge to just change it. gah. whatever.
the memories
so dear
5:17 PM
well.*
it's been a long time, and something tells me there's more waiting to be done. oh, damnit. haha.
woanrong is so, so, so cunning.
just came back from my aunt's place.. went to see my cousin and my little niece first. she's so cute! hehee. when you talk to her she just opens her eyes and stares back at you. haha..
went to cut my hair today. i think it looks okay, no major disaster. haha.
well. not really in the mood for blogging.. maybe because nothing big happened today.
woanrong, i tell you liao, 13, 13!! haha.. too bad if you can't get that clue.. haha.. it's been amusing letting you guess, guess, and guess some more, while trying all means and ways to get me to tell you the truth. haha. entertainment eh.
`let's help each other forget the past and the others and start over again.. together..*]]
have i mentioned i hate starting over? yeah i did. a long time ago.
i hate starting over.
but i guess some things are just meant to be.
i have a feeling i have to wait for a long time.
the memories
so dear
Friday, June 10, 2005
12:59 PM
first love*
this song's called "first love" by utada hikaru.. i first fell in love with it when we played it in band.. was that sec 2 or sec 3.. back then really had the 'feeling' for it.. haha.. it's absolutely beautiful. i tried getting it on my radioblog, but apparently i don't know enough html to get the link.. haha.. but you can go to radioblogclub and search under 'utada hikaru' for the song.. it's marvelous.
haha.. sad to say i can't translate japanese.. and many websites are giving different interpretations of the exact same lyrics so i'm not sure which one is the accurate one..
even though i can't say that this song applies to me.. haha.. because he's not the one for me anymore.. i don't think he ever was.. perhaps it was just a mistake to begin with. sometimes i feel sorry that i led him on.. but then again.. would you keep a guy who keeps clinging on to you, gets jealous when you even look at other guys, or talk to your guy friends.. or even just don't sms him goodnight.. it's ridiculous.. i gave him chances, but unfortunately he didn't treasure them.. he never did change. he never understood.
he probably never will. ._.
why am i boring you with my stupid life story.. haha.. anyway.. the lyrics for "first love" is below.. enjoy.
Sai gou no kisu wa
tabako no fla vor ga shita
niga kute setsunai kaori
Ashita no imagoro ni wa
Anata wa doko ni iru n darou
Dare wo omotteru n darou
You are always gonna be my love
Itsuka dareka to mata koi ni ochitemo
I'll remember to love
You taught me how
You are always gonna be the one
Ima wa mada kanashii love song
Atarashi uta utaeru made
Tachidomaru jikan ga
Ugokidasou to shiteru
Wasuretakunai koto bakari
Ashita no imagoro ni wa
Watashi wa kitto naiteru
Anata wo omotteru n darou
You will always be inside my heart
Itsumo anata dake no basho ga aru kara
I hope that I have a place in your heart too
Now and forever you are still the one
Ima wa mada kanashii love song
Atarashii uta utaeru made
You are always gonna be my love
Itsuka dareka to mata koi ni ochitemo
I'll remember to love
You taught me how
You are always gonna be the one
Mada kanashii love song
Now and forever
it's been three days.. he hasn't contacted me.. let's face it.. he doesn't care as much as i thought he did.
well.. maybe next week, after the band interview thing, i'll be going to stay with my grandmother.. so if you guys want to contact me, call my handphone.. yup..
i'm in the mood to change my blogskin again.. so sue me.
the memories
so dear
Thursday, June 09, 2005
6:17 PM
tired of the excuses.*
hah, i didn't know how right i was on sunday, did i.
busy. the international excuse. well done!
why can't people be more original, like vera's friend, who said, "i have my issues"? gah.
it's been stressful day after stressful day for me.. firstly the tune-in(which we had one week to do and carry out), then the band chalet proposal(which i spent one whole effing day doing), and then the sc trial(which almost killed me.. i almost fainted in front of the band i swear)..
yesterday, i went to school early.. didn't want to see ms yap, so kinda hid in the band room. gah. only me and kwang liang was there.. julian had lessons i think, mag had classes too. ter was sick, so. had combined sectionals with huifen and percussion.. was quite fun. went through les mis, jap graf 4, and irish tune. then, went for lunch with the percussion section(the guys) and kwang liang.. woanrong joined us when we were buying drinks, and we went back to the band room together.. haha.. then, after lunch, was the sc trial.. my hands were really really shaking.. was very nervous.
actually wanted to conduct bar 69 onwards of armenian dances, but chong hui wanted to conduct that part, so i decided to do bars 1 to 30.. then jocelyn would do bars 30 to 69, chong hui would do bars 69 to the slow movement, and grace would do the slow movement till bar 224.
when i went in to tune, i was quite scared, because i had to tune the higher woodwinds.. they're so hard to tune.. i found out that the e flat clar was supposed to tune with the flutes.. how stupid of me. the alto saxes were quite in tune, luckily.. had to do some tuning here and there, but it was rather okay. the flute section though.. oh my god.. i didn't even know whether they were sharp or flat! gah! so i had them tune to hwa ee, who was using a tuner.. phew.. but they were still a little out of tune. the clarnets were okay, asked them to tune to marcus but he was a little shakey, but nevermind. when i tuned them together again, they were in tune for a while, so i stopped before they went out of tune again. then suvenna told me to continue with the armenian dances.
okay, so i didn't go for the first meeting about the sc trial because i was rushing to the tjc concert.. so i didn't know we were supposed to analyse the piece, and also to give the band pointers on playing better. then i tried asking grace, and she was rather vague, so i basically went in there unprepared. i was so scared, but once i started, and once the band played the first note, all the nervousness was gone. the only problem i think was that i didn't look at the band.. but imagine, you bring your hand down and you hear the cymbals, trumpets, playing loudly and grandly.. there's that wonderful feeling.. and at bar 19 too, when the theme from the first few bars comes back again.. just wonderful.. it's hard to describe.. conducted it through once, then did a bit of the running notes, and the triplet demi-semiquavers part, quite interesting. unfortunately i didn't know enough to teach them anything. i don't think i'm in any position to teach them anything right now, anyway.. then went through it twice more, just for the feeling of it.. i still love the feeling of the first note.. so grand, it just blows me away.. everything feels so different when you're standing in front of the band than when you play in the band.. i conducted wrongly at the 3-4 bar.. i conducted it was 4-4, realised the mistake and changed at the last minute.. shit i think i confused my section la.. they came in wrongly and it was all my fault. sheesh. but nevermind. it's the experience that counts, right? =)
since i was the first to finish, i went outside and sat in the little space inbetween the two doors with grace and jocelyn.. listening to chong hui conduct the band.. all of a sudden, there were horn parts i never knew existed! haha! and from where we sat, it sounded quite awful.. no offence to the horn section, but seriously. the offbeats and everything.. and it sounded quite messy when the whole band was playing together. i know i didn't use up my whole 25 minutes because they didn't stop me.. chong hui did, but he said he only managed to conduct 4 pages. in the middle of his conducting he started clapping the timing for the band.. haha. when he came out, jocelyn went in. the three of us sat talking in the small room..
then yogi came into the room.. he had just finished his lessons.. so chong hui told him that dr lee was inside conducting the band(when in fact he wasn't.. haha!). then he asked us why we were outside instead of inside playing, and chong hui said 'dr lee' sent us out because we were talking. then he went on to say that 'dr lee' told us that since we liked to talk so much, he was going to make us conduct the band. i knew what chong hui was doing and i supported him.. haha.. and yogi believed us! haha. when there was a pause in the music, we were kind of scared that he'd hear jocelyn's voice and know we were bluffing, so grace was like, hurry up go in there! and yogi said, "dowan lah later dr lee diao me.." haha! we managed to get him in.. haha i wish i could have seen the look on his face!
jocelyn's part was abit messy too, but i know the dear was very nervous. haha. then grace went in. can't really remember what happened, but azfar came in and we tried the whole 'dr lee is inside' thing again.
haha! at the end of it all, edwin, sujin and suvenna sat and talked to us.. pointed out all our mistakes, which was quite a lot.. haha.. well, it's a good learning experience i guess. went for sectionals, and aidah came to ask for the tee shirt money. ter wasn't around so they automatically expected me to pay for him first.. haha.. and julian conveniently didn't bring any money.. so i had to pay for three people.. and aidah was followed by eileen who was collecting money for acjc concert.. damnit why are we forced to go. darn. anyway. paid up. so i'm feeling rather broke now thanks.
after band, went to play soccer. luckily i brought an extra shirt so i could play. haha! it was quite fun. jun wei decided to smack me with the ball though.. oww.. haha.. but it's okay. it's nice to know he has no qualms about hitting me.. haha! what a stupid thought. edwin kicked the ball over the fence and had to go out and get it.. kenneth was showing off by doing a pull-up on the fence in an attempt to look for the call.. haha so i said jokingly, "why don't you climb over and get the ball?" to my shock he actually started climbing! i had to tell him i was joking before he'd come down.. haha! then we played a while more, then packed up and went home.
a stressful and fun day.
today, i went out with vera to tm.. we met for lunch first, at pastamania.. she wanted to go to spotlight, but it was closed, so we went to dhoby ghaut, ps, to the spotlight there. haha after looking for a long time we managed to find what she wanted.. i also sort of got what i wanted.. two new books.. "school rumble". quite interesting. can't wait for the next books to come out.. but i really wanted "h3 school"! darn.. i only have book one.. i want to finish buying the series, until book five.
came home, had piano lesson.. so what else is new.. this time next weel will be having dinner with some band peeps(hopefully) before the acjc concert.. haha.. i know kaixiang is very excited about the concert right? *nudge* haha..
okie. shall go slack somewhere else now. byebye.
the memories
so dear
Tuesday, June 07, 2005
5:33 PM
at home.*
yes i'm spending my day at home. are you happy now?
if it was as innocent as it was supposed to be, then why do i feel so hurt?
went to school today, worked on the band chalet proposal before and during physics lecture. went for breakfast with genevia, and we talked about a lot of things. worked on the proposal too. then we went for physice tutorial, where i worked on the proposal some more. after that, i went to meet amanda and vanessa to finalize the proposal. *he* smsed me and told me that he wouldn't be able to make it tonight.. i didn't reply him. told gene about it.. kenneth was there, he was rather lonely because kiong wee pang seh-ed him. haha.. at about 2, went for lunch with kenneth after everything had been confirmed.
sat at long john silver's with kenneth until 4+, talking about random stuff. called vanessa and amanda to confirm a few more stuffs, then went to the mrt station with kenneth. he went to the esplanade to get his 'manuel'(it's actually a book on how to play the double bass haha) and i came home.
and i have to type out the chalet proposal so i'm sorry that this post was short and brief.
adieu, or should i say, cheers. =)
the memories
so dear
Monday, June 06, 2005
6:37 PM
school, band, and soccer.*
school was okay. reached about a half hour early, sat outside the band room with alan, kwang liang, and one of alan's friends. haha, he was amused at the photos i took of the sunrise, because on has birds in it, and the other has a plane! haha. went for physics, managed to copy everything. well, almost everything. haha! and then went for fmaths late, because i went to set up my instrument in the band room with yan leng first. then went for fmaths, spent a lot of the time talking to gene and ian. hehee. drew a little gingerbread boy ian. it's so.. fat. and it has eyebags and an ugly mouth. but ian didn't complain haha. and ian drew a little gingerbread ian of his own, one that was, well, mutilated. haha. was smsing marcus in the lecture, and then jessica smsed me. then woanrong called, but i couldn't pick up! darn!
the band went for lunch at 12! and i only finished past 12.30! so i rushed to kfc to look for them.. woanrong, and my section seniors. managed to finish lunch, and got back slightly late. but nevermind.
played irish tune.. boring! can't believe we're gonna play that for concert! people can die listening to it! haha! and armenian.. whoohoo! and we did a little of les mis as well. it's so cool and so fun!
we finished early, so we went to play soccer.. sujin was like, "soccer!" and julian and i both said at the same time, "on!" dr lee seemed shocked to know that i play soccer with the guys. haha! should have seen his face. anyway. playing soccer in skirts is not good. it's so not fun can.. sucks la.. restricts my movement.
the sercurity guard told us we could play till 6, but at 5.35 the stupid school attendant came to chase us away! it's so unfair! sheesh..
so, guys, when's the next time we're playing? tell me in advance can.. need to bring my stuff lol!
and so that's how it is. and i'm here blogging.
with silence and tears
the memories
so dear
Sunday, June 05, 2005
4:47 PM
silence and tears.*
don't ask, just read.
When we two parted
In silence and tears,
Half broken-hearted
To sever the years,
Pale grew thy cheek and cold,
Colder, thy kiss;
Truly that hour foretold
Sorrow to this.
The dew of the morning
Sunk, chill on my brow,
It felt like the warning
Of what I feel now.
Thy vows are all broken,
And light is thy fame;
I hear thy name spoken,
And share in its shame.
They name thee before me,
A knell to mine ear;
A shudder comes o'er me...
Why wert thou so dear?
They know not I knew thee,
Who knew thee too well..
Long, long shall I rue thee,
Too deeply to tell.
In secret we met
In silence I grieve
That thy heart could forget,
Thy spirit deceive.
If I should meet thee
After long years,
How should I greet thee?
With silence and tears.
if you recognise this poem, tell me.. if you're reading this tell me.. if you know what i mean by putting this here, tell me.. if you even read my blog anymore, tell me.. if you got my message on o1o6o5, tell me..
i don't understand why you continually ignore me. i try to salvage what is left of our friendship.. or is there a friendship to begin with?
what's on your mind?
if this is the way you want to see me, years from now, with silence and tears..
tell me.
so that, at least, i know. and i can stop hurting at last.
588437.. 4 6477 968..
that last verse really struck close to my heart.. i grieve the loss of a dear friend.. i can only hope that one day things will be back to the way they were before.. that we can talk the way we used to.. that we can laugh together, that we don't have to walk past each other in the corridors and pretend not to see each other. that i don't have to force myself to smile at you anymore, knowing you won't smile back. that i won't have to get frustrated over messaging you, knowing that if i didn't, i'd regret it; if i did, you wouldn't reply anyway.
but then again.. perhaps it is better this way.. the reason i didn't try for *jc was because i thought it'd be easier for me to forget, the way you easily forgot about me.. and for a while, i thought it worked.. i had a new life in tpjc and you weren't all i thought about anymore.. and when people looked through my phone, they'd say, "oh, you know him?" with nothing more than a little interest, because they know you too. it stung, but it was only slight compared to other times. but when i saw you on o1o6o5, a new wave of grief just washed over me.. before i could say more than 'hi', you just rushed off, and you didn't hear what i tried to say. you probably wouldn't want to listen anyway.
busy.
i'll never forget what you said to me.. it hurt me really deeply, scarred me very badly. but you know what..? i forgive you.
i can only hope that you can forgive me too.
the memories
so dear
1:50 PM
the best guys are girls.*
hehee. that's what chel darling's nickname says. "the best guys are girls". hehee that's so.. erm.. cute. haha.
i'm hooked onto the song 'two beds and a coffee machine'! haha. it's so nice. hah. well.
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was just sitting and thinking about the band! hehee. yup, it's become a real real big part of my life. there's sc trial coming up, and the interview too. hope dr lee goes easy on me.. haha! there's not much i know about running a band! well.
i want to hug kenneth's bass. it's really that nice to hug. then again, i want to bang on the piano as well, until the strings snap. but then, maybe not.
still slightly disappointed about friday, but i'm coming to terms with it. had a lot of time to think about stuff while i was outside with yu ngai. he's so nice to stay outside with me when he could go in and play with the band. but his pants.......... hahaha! okay i shan't be evil, i shan't laugh. i didn't have an instrument to use anyway, samuel was using my darling yamaha. i forgot to ask mag if he's zai or not. well, shall find out another time, i guess. anyway, thinking about stuff. yeah. a lot of thinking. talked to yu ngai abit too, he's quite nice. but it was mostly rather boring.. haha.
hmm.. so many left over pencils! stupid julian didn't even bother to help.. even kiong wee took two dozen pencils(result: one pencil with the chinese character for 'death' written all over it.. ._.)! haha.. maybe we can use them at the next tune in or something. haha.
at the end of it all.. 18 people showed up for tune-in, and 18 people are appealing through band for the direct school admission thingy.
still rather tired. i don't want to go for physics tomorrow, there's band! i want band! oh dang, and then there's fmaths make up. darn!! i don't wanna go~.. haix. see how la. haha.
the memories
so dear
Saturday, June 04, 2005
6:50 PM
this post has no title either.*
i am so tired.
i am so confused.
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the memories
so dear
Friday, June 03, 2005
6:47 PM
there is no title.*
listening to second suite in f.. yogi gave the link to download it, so i did. now, if only i had a better sound system so that i can actually hear the soft parts. nah just kidding heh. and! i realised our band is in desperate need of an oboist. there was this oboe player here today for the 'direct school admission'(where you can go audition for a performing arts and if they accept you, just get under 20 points to be able to come to the jc which is so totally unfair because the batches before had to work our asses off just to make it to jc it's not right i tell you, it's not right) and he's quite okay, i guess, but who am i to talk. but i'm glad! we have an oboist(i hope)!
tune in.. last night, azfar told me that the time had changed.. from 9 - 12 to 2 - 5.. informed my sl's and then answered a lot of questions.. julian called to make sure i got the message.. okay fine he's not that bad. then i went to bed, but couldn't sleep. and when i did fall asleep, i had a nightmare about the tune in. this morning, even before band started, my hands were shaking.. i went into lt5 with kenneth and kwang liang to bang on the piano, trying to calm myself down. julian was getting on my nerves by telling me, 'only 13 people are going to show up. don't need to make the souveniers le'. basically because he didn't help with the souveniers anyway. bloody hell.
it was okay i guess. i went to paste the signs up with suv, but by lunchtime half of them had disappeared. like what the fish. suv says it might be **** but i'm not saying anything.. very upset about it though.. spent so much time making those signs only for them to be taken down by some idiot or other..
18 people came for tune in, better than julian said. there was this one tall, skinny tubist named samuel, he took my instrument because i had to stay outside and watch the stuff, usher the other sec 4s into the band room and take care of the admin things. yu ngai accompanied me. thanks.. but it was a rathe boring afternoon. mr lim and ms wong came and went a few times. went back into lt5.. had a very freaky encounter. =x mr lim came again, and he gave me this piece of cake in a box.. he said because i looked sad and bored. then dr lee came out of the room, and he was like, "don't be sad la.." then he said something about failure and success.. honestly i didn't really know what he said because my chinese isn't that great. i don't know. i feel.. disappointed i guess. i had hoped more people would come. *sigh* thanks to mag, amanda, sam, and kaixiang for caring.. i guess i was a little upset. but i'm okay, really. i was also very very tired.
got my armenian dances score from grace.. i'm conducting the whole piece, plus tuning the higher woodwinds(alto sax, flute, clarinet, piccolo) for the student conductor trial.. which reminds me i should scrutinize my score about now. but nevermind.
i sort of kidnapped kenneth's bass. it's so nice to hug because it's so tall, and i was feeling down and in need of something to hug anyway. i kept my back to kenneth as he tried(unsuccessfully) to claim his 'wife' back from me. haha.
some of the band members are going to watch monster-in-law with dr lee now. i wish i could go with them.. but well. next time, maybe.
i am damn tired. don't provoke me or i'll bite your head off I SWEAR.
the memories
so dear
Thursday, June 02, 2005
12:30 PM
tjc concert!*
yesterday was, well, you could say, great. but then, it wasn't so great either.
oh, what am i talking about.
had a meeting first thing in the morning. basically told the committee what we were going to do for tomorrow. okay, so grace did all the talking, but she was happy about it. the thing that got me really pissed was that julian seemed to think that we should know everything(even the stuff they don't tell us), so he said, "you guys want sectionals, that's okay. you all booked the classrooms already?"
okay. number one, we didn't know we have to book the classrooms. like wth. and secondly, no one told us how to book them. stupid question.
and then he kept shooting these stupid questions at grace. sure, some of them actually made sense, but he's talking about impossible stuff, like "what if 20 tubists came?" or "what if suddenly 50 people come at the same time?" i was fuming inside! how idiotic could he be, man! it was really all i could do to calm myself down, place my hands behind my head, look relaxed and say, "shut up, julian." twice. argh! really wanted to just.. hammer his head in or something.
i didn't want to talk to him the whole day, i even told mag i wouldn't speak to him.
but damn it's so hard to stay mad at him. ._.
at the last minute, daniel asked me, grace and azfar to do first shift at the foyer counter, for those sec4s who were appealing through the direct admission thingy. during our shift, there were only like, six people! and only one appealed through band, a clarinetist. well, hope there'll be more today/tomorrow? after a while, cloe, julian, yixin and eileen took over second shift.. went for sectionals.
we played second suite! so fun! it's really fast and there's a lot of running notes.. just what i like. haha. then we went for lunch, and after lunch had more sectionals..
was getting quite restless because i thought band was going to end at 5, and i was going for the tjc concert. but dr lee combined until 6+! me, mag, aidah, magdalene, and sazali made a mad dash to victoria.. i wanted to buy flowers but the shop at raffles place was closed, so i couldn't get any. we made it just in time though. lucky for me, because their first piece was russlan and ludmilla, and i wanted to hear that piece!
it wasn't as fast as i expected, but then again, there are so many running notes that if they went any faster the woodwinds would just die. haha! invictus was nice, and the chosen.
I LOVE THE STAGE BAND.
oh my god it was so cool. hahah. i like the way t.chow embarrassed himself, though. hehee. okay i shan't be evil but yes. and he was still wearing that red tie. it was really really great. hehee.
i saw edmund and cuicui! hehee. edmund is so cute now that he actually talks. ahaha. and he was wearing that blue tie. haha. i said hi to someone and he actually said hi back.. but before i could tell him how much i liked the performance he just swept past me as if he forgot i was there already.. okay fine.. so maybe he had other people to look for.. have to keep reminding myself he does have a life too..
saw fang, and all the other tkgs peeps! it was so cool.. like a little mini tkg reunion in vch. haha!
after that, went home with mag.. had a talk with her.. i'm so glad to have her. it kinda amazes me how much our friendship has deepened in the past few months.. =) i'm glad. really glad.
i smsed him, hoping he'd maybe reply.. but he didn't.
slept at 12+.. was reading a book.. tired right now. oh well.
i don't know whether i'm meeting azfar and grace later.. i don't think so.. got so much to do.. sian. still need to make those pencil-things. the band was rather cooperative, we managed to get 48 people to make the pencils.. that's great, i guess.
the numbers are sad. asked around, zero, zero, zero. why?
i hope everything's gonna be okay for tomorrow.
thanks lynn, for the encouragement.. means a lot to me. =)
and he's off to camp.
can't contact him till monday.. can i?
but he'd be busy.
the memories
so dear